A friend said I was out of his league!


I had an interesting conversation recently with a friend which has prompted me to clear up a few things in this post.

This friend would love to get healthier and fitter but is overwhelmed by where to start. He admitted that while he reads some of my posts he actually ignores most because he feels that the gap between where he is at and where I am is just too wide and my level of health is simply unattainable for him. He feels embarrassed about where he’s currently at and simply doesn’t think we’re reading from the same page.

This gave me a lot to think about in how I get my message across. I thought I was making it clear but if this friend didn’t think so, then perhaps more of you are thinking the same.

Let me start by saying, your starting point doesn’t matter!

Let’s take weight loss for example. You are on a journey say, from A to B, no matter your starting point and end goal. My approach is not that I put you on some crash diet to reach B as quickly as possible. I won’t  take your money and run, then leave you floundering when you don’t enjoy the food and you you struggle to incorporate it with family life, then watch you ‘fail’ when after 3 weeks real life steps in and the weight piles back on!

No, no, no, no, no! Instead I work WITH clients to decide what their end goals are, what changes would be of benefit and what action steps are realistic for them as an individual, taking in to consideration work schedule, family life, likes/dislikes, finances and so on. The aim is to IMPROVE, not be perfect. Gradual small changes over a period of weeks and months will propel you to your goals, but in a healthy and achievable manner. I would never expect a client who has lived off of junk food and ready meals and never done a days exercise, to suddenly be eating quinoa and kale and entering marathons!! It doesn’t stop at weight loss either, I work with people who need to manage their lifestyle and stress. Sometimes stress is so overwhelming that we can’t see how we can possibly cope. Again, small gradual changes to your lifestyle and behaviours will help you to either eliminate the stress or cope with it if it’s something that can’t be changed.

I understand where my friend is coming from – he sees my posts on Facebook about meals I’ve made or what exercise I’ve done, how I made time to meditate and he just can’t imagine being at that stage. But believe me, this didn’t happen overnight for me either! Until a few years ago I’d never even heard of quinoa or kale and I thought meditation was something only hippy people did! My journey to where I am now has taken a good few years and I still have so much I want to achieve! I could equally look at other fitter people and think ‘I could never be like that’ or I could look at those who make literally all their food from scratch and think I’m a failure because I still buy my almond milk instead of making it myself.

So my point is, don’t compare yourself to me or anyone else. You are on your own unique journey and there’s no such thing as perfect, and if there was, trust me, I am not it!

There are most definitely people out there who I admire for the stage they have reached which is beyond mine. Some of them have achieved goals that I would definitely like to achieve too, but I’m not going to beat myself up over it for not having got there yet… I do the best I can with the time, money and know-how that I have. I am constantly tweaking and making improvements and to be honest, when it comes to well-being, you will never get to a point where you’ve perfected it all. I actually like that. Health and wellbeing goes way beyond the plate and there’s so much to learn and that excites me!

But let’s imagine you get close to ‘perfection’, there will still be days that you just think ‘sod it’ and you’ll eat pizza followed by a Mars bar and you’ll stick your fingers up to the gym!

Believe me, I get those days too! Well, not the pizza bit as I don’t like pizza much but I’m no stranger to the chocolate and sticking my fingers up to the gym! But that’s fine, I’m human and I have a real life so I do the best I can for the majority of the time and hey, the odd bad day here and there won’t kill me (unless I choke to death on a Mars bar)!

So whatever your starting point, it seriously is irrelevant, so don’t feel intimidated or embarrassed. I’m not here to judge, I’m here to help, to motivate, support and encourage as you make your way on your own journey.

If you would like to know more about how I could help you, please get in touch. I offer a free 1 hour, no obligation, consultation so we can discuss your fears, your goals and decide if working together is right for you.

“No-one ever got to the top of the mountain in one jump.” – Doe Zantamata